When do I need help for a sexual problem?
Many problems, such as women unable to achieve orgasm, or men experiencing erection dysfunction, can be addressed successfully with self-help books. "For Yourself" (female sexuality) by Lonnie Barbach, Ph.D. and "The New Male Sexuality" by Bernie Zilbergeld, Ph.D. are good examples. You need a sex therapist when you have a sexual problem, or a relationship problem that is causing a sexual problem, that you are not able to "ﬁx" by yourself. Common problems include sexual incompatibility, sex too routine and boring, sexual desire discrepancy, difﬁculties with orgasm/ erection/premature ejaculation, pain during intercourse, sexual compulsivity, gender and/or orientation issues, and paraphilias. Sometimes sexual problems are caused by, or are side effects of, other emotional factors, such as depression, or medicines. Often they are caused by other dynamics in the relationship. I will assess the various components and suggest a course of action, which might be individual or couples therapy, assessment by a medical doctor in consideration of medication, or other interventions.